On my heart

As I get older, I realize there is more hurt and bad things that happen in this world. Lately, I have realized how important it is to have community and friendships.

Since high school, I have been friends with a solid group of girls.  We have been through a lot together, moved to different states and some don't talk as much as we used to, but it brings such joy to my heart knowing that when we are all back in the same state, we pick up where we left off.

Some of us were talking a couple weeks ago, how in high school we would have never imagined that things would happen to us as they have....

My sweet friend Britney lost her son at 6 months old. He didn't wake up from his nap. Who would have thought? We celebrated what would have been his first Birthday this month at his grave with balloons in hand to release. But now she is pregnant again and what a JOY!

Leslies Grandpa was murdered the night of her wedding. A joyful day turned tragic.  A day my sweet friend Leslie had dreamed of for years will always have a memory of driving to the hospital instead of their honeymoon.

This is what Leslie had to say the other day about everything:

"I wanted life, even the death penalty. Yet, who am I to judge as I am amongst the most wicked of sinners without grace upon grace. Punishment by the state is needed to ensure harmony in the law of the land. As far as punishment from the church, well I do not believe there can be such a thing. Punishment has been fulfilled, only forgiveness remains. So, I still say, I forgive these boys and hope for grace to be bestowed on them as it has been bestowed upon me."

She is pretty amazing

I almost died after giving birth.  Something that had never crossed my mind. A day I had dreamed about and now I still can't be in a dark room by myself sometimes and when I drive by the hospital I feel anxious.

But you know what is awesome?

God is still good. 

He never leaves our side.  In the good and in the bad He is here.  I have been clinging to this truth lately.

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding." Prov. 3:5

I don't understand why some things happen, but what a joy to know God does and He just wants us to trust Him in that.

I am so thankful for the friends He has put by my side for all these years. I feel blessed to be able to walk with them through the good and bad.